There's a trick with a knife I'm learning to do.

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

It was yet another sunny morning. On the lake's grassy bank near Frontierland, Una Persson lay stretched out on her stomach on a beach towel, wearing a blue maillot and reading a pristine first edition of Du côté de chez Swann that she'd borrowed from the Doctor. A blue silk caftan lay neatly folded nearby. As she read, she ate an apple, cutting slices off with her clasp knife, and reflected that unnerving though the park's absence of insect life was, it was pleasant to not have to worry about ants for once.

She'd always wanted to read À la recherche du temps perdu, but she'd never had the time. Now, having nothing but Time of a sort and the TARDIS library at her disposal, she reckoned she should take the opportunity. But between the oddly soothing quality of Proust's prose and the soporific warmth of the day, Una soon found her eyelids growing heavy. She took off her sunglasses and put her head down, thinking to rest for just a moment. Soon she was dozing like a cat in the sun, the breeze occasionally ruffling her hair and the pages of the open book, a half-eaten apple and the open clasp knife near her elbow.

((Some small number of days after Una's latest confab with Starbuck. Closed to Una and the Master; of course, as long as they're outside, passersby who might conceivably be in the area could easily catch sight of them, but it's probably best not to interfere.  ^_^))

((ETA: *facepalm* Do I really have to say anything, warning-wise? We should know better than to leave them around sharp objects...))

Comments

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

There was a whispery sound from the knife and he offered another slice of the apple to her. "It's a wonder you don't burn alive out here." He blinked up at the sun a moment, then back down at her. "How's the tan coming?"

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

She reached out to take the apple slice. At his question, she glanced down appraisingly at her shoulder and twitched the strap aside. "You tell me," she said. "Oddly, one doesn't seem to sunburn here. Unnerving like so much else, but I'm not complaining."

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

He gave her shoulder a careful once over. "Darker than last time, looks like. Makes you wonder about the sun, though, doesn't it? Or the atmosphere, at any rate." He twitched her strap back into place with a wicked smirk.

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

"One of many things to wonder about," she murmured, smoothing the strap down. She smiled up at him, a little ironically.

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

"Was that an indirect inquiry, or were you being facetious?" He caught a strand of her hair as it was taken up by the breeze and wrapped it once around his finger.

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

That little action was, in a way, a partial answer to the indirect inquiry. Her smile widened slightly.

"It's been a longer while than usual since we last talked," she said, not quite answering his question with another indirect one.

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

"Mm," he hummed, not giving indication either way as to what that might mean. "A lot of things going on, I suppose. What with tempter tantrums and vague disappearances and long chats about unfortunate things."

Which reminded him, "Oh, I'd avoid the Rani even more so now, by the way. She's been spying on the two of us. Which means she's done a fair bit of spying on you by proxy."

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

"Oh, we've had words, she and I. I don't think she likes me very much. On the other hand, she didn't pull out a tranquiliser gun or show any sign of wanting to fasten me to a laboratory table, so I daresay it could have been worse." She glanced at her book, made a note of her place, and closed it. "As for those 'things going on' ... yes, there has been rather a lot of all of those things, hasn't there?" He clearly knew all about the Doctor's childish, abortive attempt to flee; she wondered if he knew about the piece of her mind she'd handed him. She smirked. "At least you did seem to be managing reasonably well the other day."

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

Cutting another apple slice, he snorted. "Don't take it personally; she never liked anyone much. And don't be so sure that you're in the clear for the lab table either. She has a bit of a flare for the dramatic, though she'd deny it through and through."

He wasn't quite sure which other day she was referring to, nor was he sure of exactly what she meant by bringing it up. "Don't think that I'm enjoying it," he said, and it would have come off as a joke, except it was so very unfunny. "It's like being reprogrammed with faulty software. Completely unnatural functions overrunning all the usual pathways. The only constellation is knowing that I might make it out of here with my mind more or less intact, and there's really no fun in that."

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

"You think?" Una said ironically. "She strolled up behind me out of the blue and introduced herself with 'You there'." Her impression of the Rani's imperious tone was, she felt, fairly spot on. "Dramatic, indeed."

She sat up, leaning back on her hands, stretching out her legs and crossing them at the ankles. She'd been thinking of the community Truth or Dare game, but his candour was much more interesting than her original meaning. "At least you've not lost sight of the larger goals," she said, quite sincerely. "Even through the uncomfortable necessity of readjusting one's instincts."

Her gaze flicked to the knife and apple in his hands, and it finally occurred to her that perhaps she ought to be the slightest bit concerned about having left sharp objects out for him. Which was followed by the enormously amused thought that, considering some of the things on his workbench that were regularly within arms' reach of the two of them, her clasp knife was really the absolute least of her worries.

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

The Master couldn't help but laugh. "Don't ever let her hear you do that. She doesn't take kindly to impersonation. I found that out the hard way once." And it had only been once; he'd known much better afterward. Though, he hadn't understood what the big deal was at the time. –honestly, Ushas, he needed the laugh after all that, and at least it pulled him out of that stupor long enough to get him to work on those greenhouse panels–

He held out the next slice of apple, flipping the knife from end to end in his other hand for a moment. It had been a long time since he had used knives as weaponry, but there were certain things one never forgot. "I get the distinct impression that things are being expected of me," he said after a moment. "Nothing really takes the wind out of your sails quite as effectively."

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

"Must be a good story, that," she said, feeling oddly pleased at having made him laugh. She took the offered apple slice and ate it, watching him handle the knife. The easy motion was fascinating in a way that she was fairly sure was not quite right—but the same could be said of so much of theirs; she really ought to be used to that by now. "Expected? By what or by whom? And what sorts of things?"

Well, if he really was in a forthcoming mood...

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

"She had a tendency to drop experiments in your food when you made her angry," he said with a wince. "And then you either had to think of an antidote quickly or beg her for it, which she liked better."

He thought back to the air in the room at that little party gathering. "People are talking. Small community, it's inevitable. So they start assuming things; I get the feeling that I could have given any dare at all back there and it would have been taken out of context. So is there actually any point to behaving myself? Or should I be a saint and really through everyone for a loop?"

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

She made a sympathetic grimace. "A flair for drama and a vengeful streak. Lovely."

As far as the business about people talking, there was nothing to be gained from pointing out that she'd told him so. "Don't tell me you're concerned about what people are thinking. Unless it's only insofar as it inconveniences you." She snorted. "Anyway—come now, ice on bare skin? That would've been interpreted in a certain way by any number of people, no matter who came up with the challenge." Una had found the whole business bizarrely funny, though discomfiting in a way she couldn't quite put her finger on. "Still, I see your point, I think. Once expectations have been defined, or redefined, it's hard to know where true perversity lies, isn't it?"

She was honest enough with herself to know that she wasn't just talking about his own dilemma. The situations to which that statement could apply were, in fact, manifold.

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

"Drama, a vengeful streak and an unfortunate knowledge of your anatomy," he corrected. "Her area of expertise was rather far from ours." They would have never been so effective when they joined forces had that not been the case.

He rolled his eyes, but only a little. "I thought it was funny. Granted I was thinking of a prior incident that made it particularly amusing from my angle. Some people really do have no sense of humour. She took it like a warrior's challenge, inviting that immortal so-and-so up there to be her protector. And then he cheated for her." He sighed. True perversity became another matter altogether in a place like this.

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

"I can see there'll never be a dull moment with all three of you here," Una said. Irony again; wasn't as if there'd been many dull moments with just the two.

"She's a nervy little thing, Ms Pollard. And another person who I don't think likes me very much. But brave, in her way, and like most people worth knowing, more than a little stubborn."

Then: "...wait, immortal? Who, Crowley?" Because she was reasonably sure that John was a mostly-normal human.

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

"Well then, she doesn't like either of us," the Master said with an uninterested air. "Why, what did you do to her?"

Sometimes he forgets that the Doctor might not immediately tell her things like that. After all, he had mentioned Miss Pollard saying something about the fellow trying to lie low. Whatever that was supposed to mean. "Yes, him. You were chatting with him at one point, I believe. Don't suppose you noticed the top of the cane either?"

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

"Not a thing," Una said. "I've nothing against her myself; I think it's just one of those moments of negative chemistry—the opposite of liking someone immediately on sight." She shrugged, though she was a little aggrieved at the situation. "What's she got against you, then? Apart from daring her to put ice cubes down her shirt." There might have been just the faintest hint of suspicion in her tone.

"Rather flash, the cane. I didn't get a close look at it, as he was leaning on it at the time, but it looked like some sort of snake head or other." She smirked. "Don't tell me he's some sort of snake deity or something."

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

The suspicion tickled him. "Honestly? Practically nothing. Unless she really was that put off by my calling in to one or two radio shows and requesting songs of a less than cheerful nature. Which is what brings me back to the talking problem. I think she was forewarned. And I was ever so polite to her...."

His nose crinkled at the mention of a snake deity. "Nothing quite like the Mara as such. No, the snake is holding an apple in its mouth. Different sort of mythology."

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

"Oh yes, some fine musical selections there." Very dry, that statement. "Forewarned by whom, I wonder? Wasn't me, anyway, in case you're wondering."

It didn't take her long to put together the hints about Crowley. "Oh, you've got to be—" She paused, then snorted, amused. "Well, if we can have goddesses and Antichrists and fictional characters walking about here, I suppose the Serpent in the Garden is hardly that unusual. God, you can get used to anything around here."

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

Which unfortunately brought him to, "It might have been the T-rex, for all I'm certain." Was he really going to go there?

He would probably have to, in light of the rest. "Yes, I suppose you can. Of course, he can't be a very good demon if he's going around helping his human friends and doing little more than annoy people by hoarding alcohol."

I dunno, I was expecting him to be more… well, more like you, honestly. The more he thought about it, the more the Doctor made sense.

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

At this point, the comment about the T-Rex simply read to Una as a kind of hell if I know statement. "She's friends with that man John Crichton, and he's friendly with the Doctor." A sly look. "Can't say I entirely blame Crichton if he felt like he had to say something. For all I know he's bearing tales against me too."

As to Crowley: "He's certainly one of the most mild-mannered demons I've ever met. Although ..." She chuckled. "I wonder if his plan to go driving around the park with bikini-clad women in the back of his car is a shot at tempting or arousing envy in others." She shook her head, amused. "And to think I almost volunteered."

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

He frowned. "The one with the neural clone in his head? Not that surprising, then. Though why anyone would be bearing tales against you begs my curiosity." A sideways glance. "I should probably say that the T-rex might have literally done it."

He raised his eyebrows in feigned disbelief. "Oh, and you're meaning to say you'd prefer not to tempt and arouse people? Why am I finding that hard to believe?"

[una-harlequin.livejournal.com]

"Well, you never know what sort of fallout might come from a deal with the devil. Or any demon." It was mostly a joke. She pretended to study her fingernails and ran her hand slowly through her hair. "Anyway, already did the tempt-and-arouse thing, darling. Don't tell me you've forgotten the tabloid."

Her brain reeled back and latched onto the comment about the T-Rex. "Why on earth would you think the dinosaur might have said something?" The question by itself was so absurd that she started to laugh.

[hear-the-drums.livejournal.com]

"It might be fun trying to get out of it, though." He watched a little distractedly as her hand went through her hair. "I see. Once is a charm, twice is a bore."

His lips pressed together for a moment, and suddenly he was flipping the knife again. "Ah, I forgot to mention the latest in a long series of revelations. Probably suffered a bit of memory damage from being pummeled." Which was far from the truth, but who could count at this point? "We had a talk a while back. With the Rani. Seem he knows a bit more about us than he should. A particular sort of knowing that suggested we were well-known villains to him."