Semi-closed Tomorrowland get together

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

[[Invitations here, party here. Backdated to yesterday.]]

Thankfully, the kid got over his slightly painful exchange with Katou rather quickly, especially in the face of a party and seeing everyone. He hadn't heard from Demyx, but the kid was holding out hope he'd show up anyway. Seeing the Starcade games on and going made the kid grin. The "DO NOT MAKE OUT HERE" sign on Cayce's office door only made him crack up. Fine, if he and Sara got caught making out anywhere else, and someone complained, he'd point out he wasn't making out in the office.

There were tables for refreshments on the upper level, along with tables for people to sit at with food and drink. He added some sodas he'd brought along to the refreshment table, then a couple of pizzas to another table, already feeling the giddy mood of celebrating for no reason enter his system.

His "duties" done, Setsuna went to the lower level and, instead of waiting by the door like a good host, the kid, impatiently, started to play one of the games.

Comments

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

"Sure." Setsuna didn't hesitate before pouring Demyx some more, then allowing himself just a tiny bit. After all, he deserved it, yes? Just a tiny bit....

He watched, worriedly, as Demyx massaged his temples, and all the other signs of stress. Was something wrong? Had something happened? Getting more and more concerned, Setsuna didn't wait for Demyx to explain and flatly asked, "Is Axel giving you anymore trouble?"

When Demyx went on about having trouble, Setsuna shrugged. "Well, it's okay. Just take the time you need. I'm not going anywhere, now. I know some people they don't like opening up either, so I'm used to it."

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

"It is Axel, and it isn't. I've given up on him. We never quite understood each other anyway. He's hopeless." He said it a little more sharply than he'd meant to, shook his head and bolted down the next glass. This time there was no chaser. He wanted to feel it burn.

"I'm tired, I guess. Sick and tired of being alone but every time I'm around people I feel so useless. Empty, I guess... I kind of feel like you'd understand that. I don't know why... I just do." He looked up, smiled sheepishly. "I like you a lot. I mean really like you."

The blush was back with a vengeance.

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

Well, Setsuna had a hard time believing everyone was hopeless, but he could imagine someone like Axel - Hotstreak - easily falling into that category, and, for the most part, took Demyx's word on that and just listened.

He listened pretty well to Demyx feeling alone, which, yes, Setsuna could relate to, to an extent. Setsuna did let his mouth run with, "I can usually find Kira, though, and then I don't feel lonely." Of course, Sara took away his loneliness too, but back in Tokyo, it was easier to find Kira somewhere than Sara, sadly.

And then there was the confession - so sudden, Setsuna almost missed it - and the blush. Perhaps the blush made Setsuna rewind the words in his head to make sure he got the message loud and clear, but this was one thing even oblivious Setsuna couldn't miss. Immediate damage control was sought.

"I like you too," he said as gently as he could, "as a friend. I think I'd really enjoy your company if we got to talk more, but I respect your need for distance." He hoped he wasn't being heartless about this, but admitting things from the getgo didn't just seem wise, but was programmed into Setsuna's structure, and his mouth was way ahead of him. "And I've got a girlfriend, who I love a whole lot."

But he wasn't going to let this complicate things, or ruin their friendship, his soft smile following his words said as much.

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

Demyx paled a little, and his smile dropped somewhat, but didn't have a heart to break so he just shrugged thoughtfully. "Yeah... it's fine," he replied. "I mean... I know I need to give it more time and maybe talk to some more people..."

He laid his guitar case down and straightened up again, leaned against the wall behind him. "It's just... something I was so used to before... It's kind of odd that there's no one else in bed with me all of a sudden... being alone and all that. Axel never really liked talking at four in the morning. He and I don't really see eye to eye, I guess."

He glanced at his empty glass fiddled with it just to keep his hands busy. "Oh, and you shouldn't go easy on me. Sure, I don't have a heart, and I know I'm not the brightest crayon in the box, but that doesn't mean you should feel sorry for me... I don't even feel pain. It's not like you could hurt me. If you could, I'd even welcome it."

He raised his eyebrows as soon as it was out. The alcohol was definitely taking effect now.

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, you definitely gotta talk to some more people. The park's full of 'em," Setsuna agreed there, nodding his head. He listened to the bed stuff and shrugged. "Everyone's got differences. Some people'd rather be asleep at four in the morning. I kinda like talking, if I'm awake at that hour. More like pulling pranks on other people and waking them up."

Setsuna looked at the empty glass too, listened more, and decided it wouldn't be too wise to give Demyx anymore to drink. That was enough....

"I'm not going easy on you anyway. But uhh...you sure about this feeling stuff? Or are you some masochist? Because I have to disagree. With how you go on about loneliness and stuff? I'd say you feel just as much as any normal human. And there's certainly nothing wrong with that."

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

"Like I said," he replied quietly, "No heart. None at all. Not a damn thing stirring. I'd be your slave for life if you could manage to get anything out of me without touching me." He sighed, shook his head, "Not really dead, but not alive either. Stuck between. And it's hard to talk to people because I can feel their hearts trying to resonate with one I don't have anymore and that causes problems because then I gotta fake it."

He shrugged again. "It's all just a big mess. I say I'm lonely... what I mean is I have nothing to do and I'd like someone to keep me warm at night. Really I'm as hollow and empty as this right here." He held up the glass, laughed. "And if I had the ability, I'd hate it for being like me."

After a little thought, he shook his head. "I need to shut up now. You don't deserve this."

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

Setsuna tilted his head a little in Demyx's direction, and his lips quirked a little at the edges thinking of how familiar Demyx's last words sounded. The heart stuff, on the other hand, was a little worrisome. Still, Setsuna had little to say to it.

"Kinda sucks, about the heart thing. Makes it hard for you to get the guts to come out and talk to others, huh? Is that it?" Setsuna asked, trying to put it all together in his mind, to a point he understood.

"Warm.... You need a warm body next to yours?" Damn, if only he.... "Why don't you talk more to my friend Katou?" Setsuna pointed at the other blond he had just introduced Demyx to. "And you don't need to shut up. Don't worry about that. I whine to Kira-senpai all the time, so it's only fair if I listen to my friends when they have problems."

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

Demyx smiled. "If I can be a little blunt, the best thing a nobody can get in their whole worthless existence is some good sex. Well... at least for me. You can feel something for five or ten minutes."

He sighed softly, shrugged. "Though... I kind of have to like the person a lot before I can spread my legs..."

Yep. He was definitely drunk.

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

Setsuna's eyes went wide, very wide, and he pushed all alcohol bottles away from Demyx as he processed this, though, really, this time it was clear as day.

"...well, it's not like Katou doesn't want a good fuck himself. Just...you can get to know him. I'm sure. He likes music." That was always a good start, right?

Oh dammit, Setsuna's cheeks were burning, and that was not from alcohol, for a change.

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

Demyx grinned sharply. "Sorry. I'll keep my mouth shut now. I'm probably upsetting you." He folded his arms over his chest and chuckled, but he never took his eyes off of the other.

"You do look good with a nice blush, though..." he added despite himself, "Anyway, music's a great thing. Lots of ground to work with in that respect."

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

At least Setsuna was aware most of this was probably the alcohol talking. His face lit up brighter as he tried to speak, but then failed at words, surprising even himself. Normally, there were threats about gay bars and abandonment at said bars, but they were in Disneyland, there wasn't a gay bar in sight, and Demyx was a friend.

So, music. Yeah. "You should talk to Katou then. Especially since he's got that new arm. It's probably a little tricky for him to pick up the guitar again."

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

"You know, I don't think I even played before I became a nobody," he mused, "I was a fish-person... Whatchacallit... a Mermaid? No. Mer-man. Whatever.

"Anyway, when I finally manifested my sitar, I just started playing naturally. It was like I'd never done anything else in my life... I don't know any theory or anything in any real way that I could explain it, but I think it would be nice to talk to him. I'll send him a letter sometime or something... Right now I'm in no state, to tell the truth."

He paused a bit, sobered. "Maybe I should just go home... do you think I should? I kind of said what I needed to, though I do want to talk to you about other things, I can't think right now. Not that it'll get any better even if I am sober. And then there's the fact that I do this and talk way too much..." He shrugged.

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

"A merman?" Setsuna's eyes widened. Out of all of the creatures he'd met, a merman was a new on him. "Where did your fin go after you became a Nobody?" It was, well, incredible to think of. "Do you think you could still swim under water?" And that would explain why his element was water, wouldn't it?

"I think you should write to him when you're sober, too. See what you guys make of each other. Just to warn you, Katou can be...difficult to deal with. Just tell him you met him before, and you're a friend of mine. That should do for a start," Setsuna suggested, hoping things went well there, or at least that Katou didn't act like a jerk about it.

To all the questions of what Demyx should do, Setsuna smiled a little. "I think you should do whatever you want. Sometimes, if you worry too much about what you should do, you'll get yourself all confused, and do something you regret, or wish you had done something else instead. Of course, if you still do something you'll regret, you need to accept the consequences of that action. At least you can say you did what you wanted, though."

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

Demyx smiled. "The tail thing... well, I can still assume that shape if I can remember the spell formula it required. I think my body automatically went 'human-mode' when I turned into a nobody. They found me on the beach half-drowned."

He pulled out a little notepad and scrawled a note to himself before he slid it back into his pocket and brought the pen up to his lips, nibbled the cap absently. "I'm still kind of stuck between staying and going to drown my sorrows alone, honestly... But I can camp here for a bit longer. You seem to be curious about some of my quirks, and I'm in the mood to humor all sorts of questions. Nothing's off limits tonight," he offered.

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

"...you could actually do that? Here? Could I see?" Setsuna asked, suddenly get very curious about this merman stuff. What exactly did mermen and mermaids look like anyway?

Watching the note taking, Setsuna ventured to ask, "What was that?" Demyx was right about the kid being curious. "Well, I wanna know about this merman stuff first. Do you remember any of it? Being a merman?"

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

"That was me writing a reminder to write Katou," he laughed softly, then thought for a moment. "Is there any water around? I mean, like big bodies of water... I'll show you gladly, but I just don't want to be flopping around or something."

He straightened up a little and moved his guitar against a back wall. "I can remember some stuff. Really all we do is eat, have sex, sleep, make mischief, hunt, rinse-lather-repeat."

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

"Ohhh...." Setsuna thought this writing stuff down action for a moment then muttered, "I should do that. I'm not as bad as you at forgetting things, but I'm pretty bad."

As for the question on water, Setsuna grinned and pointed in the direction of the lake. "Clearly, you don't get out much. There's a huge lake over there. With ducks!"

The daily life of a merman/mermaid got a little blinking from the kid as he processed the information. "Sex, sleep, eat, make mischief.... That sounds an awful lot like what me and Senpai do here."

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

Demyx grinned, "Carry around a notebook. Doesn't have to be a big one either... I think it's the only thing that keeps me from being completely clueless all the time."

He managed to shrug, laughed softly at the whole not getting out much comment. "I don't. I'm a homesick, heartless fish-person. And I'm absent-minded. Anyway, I'm sure it would be clean enough."

His amusement was clear on the final note; probably the closest a nobody can get to really expressing emotion. Either that or Demyx was just a damn good actor. Probably the latter. "Ah, the simple life," he chuckled, then gestured toward the door. "Shall we? Of course I could always try it again later if now isn't a good time."

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

"I'll go look for one," Setsuna decided with a shrug, hoping he'd remember to use it.

"It's weird that you're homesick, though," Setsuna pointed out. "I mean, you're not supposed to feel, and...what is your home like anyway? Are you really sure you want to go back? You're dead there...."

As for when? Setsuna headed right out, deciding the party could take care of itself now. "Now's just fine. Let's go."

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

Demyx nodded and let the other blond take the lead, thrust his hands into his pockets and simply strolled.

"Well... it's less humiliating and generally more pleasant when you're around people who understand you, you know? People don't stare at you. That and killing heartless was pretty amusing even if it did get old sometimes. Like stepping on cockroaches that respawn." He thought for a moment, then sighed, "The others didn't annoy me at The World That Never Was. Everyone understood. They were all nobodies. We had our own rooms, our own toys, our own willing and obedient servants, and anything we could ever need - minus a heart - and we were fed and well kept. We didn't need to do anything. Sure it was lonely sometimes, and the missions were shit every now and then, but we didn't have to worry about anything. If I could go back... I would. I think that maybe if we had stayed in line and behaved a little longer... if that dumb brat was never born... maybe we could have been whole..."

There was a sharp, hard sparkle of steel in his eyes not unlike a fanatic's. It was his only goal, drive, and reason to live. To get his heart back, to put it simply, was his only purpose. He seemed to calm a little, though.

"Not like I'll ever get it back when I'm stuck here."

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

"Who stares at you here?" Setsuna asked with narrowed eyes while he considered this. Why would anyone there do that? The people Setsuna had met there seemed to be the most decent sort he had ever run into.

He listened to everything else, but by then end put an arm around Demyx's shoulders and said, "I think we need to get to that lake, and you need to show me this merman shape. You can't worry about that stuff now 'cause you can't change it. But maybe something can be done later. You never know."

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

He shrugged. "Maybe it's the hair." He returned the gesture though and matched his step to Setsuna's almost as effortlessly, glanced up at the sky.

"Yeah. Good idea," he replied somewhat quietly. "Right now I'm a little worried about one thing. I've got all the necessary seals... runes, rater... for 'natural magic' in my head, and I remember the formulas for using them for this, but I can't remember the very last part of it. And since you'll probably ask me what's important about that last bit, it's the part that keeps me from turning inside out or suffocating as soon as I hit the water."

He laughed and shook his head. "But don't worry, I'll figure it out, I'm sure. And when I do, I hope you're good at charades."

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

Setsuna had to laugh at that. "I think there's plenty of people with weirder hair than yours. Maybe it's the outfit. It kinda stands out and makes you look like you belong to some creepy gang."

And then Demyx explained about the "last bit," sending Setsuna into immediate worry. Sure, he was selfish, but not so much he'd enjoy knowing he caused a friend to turn themselves inside out. Especially since Demyx was excused - he was drunk - Setsuna was not.

"Ahhh...maybe we should save this for when you're sober. And you remember this stuff," Setsuna suggested, wide eyed.

[nine-musicnotes.livejournal.com]

Another careless shrug. "Don't sweat it. It's not like I'm going to die. I know the runes I'm not supposed to use and even if I do turn inside out it's only temporary. And I'm not getting rid of the uniform. Too much sentimental attachment." He smiled and gave Setsuna's shoulder a friendly squeeze.

"Anyway, I don't mind. I'm feeling a little more courageous now. Why not give it a shot. It'd be good to go through it with you around too, since I trust ya."

[swordandchalice.livejournal.com]

The squeeze got a sheepish smile.

"Trust me to what?" Setsuna said morbidly. "Get you killed!" A beat or so later he said, "At least if you turn inside out, don't hold it against me if I look away, okay?"